Living the Life You Dream Of

as i look back on what my life looked like when i started my blog 4 years ago, things were VERY different i assure you. from the outside, i had a great life, but in peeling back the layers, i was involved in an unhealthy relationship, i was unhappy with my body image, i wasn't a Christian, and i was unsure as to where my life was headed. sure, i was surrounded by an amazing support system of friends and family, but i wasn't happy with my situation and i know i was looking for something more out of life.
it's funny how events transpire because i feel like my life changed unexpectedly for the better so very quickly. i broke up with my boyfriend at the time, meg and i moved into a new apartment which was perfect for a fresh start, i received a promotion at work, and then the real fun started...i was a single girl, living it up and doing what i wanted, until i realized i wanted something i had never had. i wanted a relationship with God.
i began going to a local church (one that we are now members of) and realized that was the missing piece of my puzzle...i desperately wanted to feel what so many of my friends and family felt, i wanted to be saved and i wanted to be a Christian. that is also when jeff and i started hanging out just the two of us, and he started joining me on Sundays at church. that's when our friendship changed into something else completely.
i am here to tell each of you (and hopefully not sound like i am on a soapbox) that though i don't routinely "preach" on my blog, this is a topic that is near and dear to my heart. i feel like i had a great life before, but once i became a Christian and put my faith in God, my life changed into something i never dreamed of. all my hopes and dreams came true.
i fell in love with my best friend, the two of us travelling all over the country for time to grow as a couple, we got engaged and bought a house together, we planned the wedding i (and mom) had always dreamed of, and then God blessed us beyond measure with our darling Caroline.
i am here to tell you that having a relationship with God changed my world for the better and that because of Him, i am able to live the life i always imagined.
if you're ever down in the dumps and are needing encouragement, advice, unconditional love, or someone to listen, God is always there...He changed my life and i am forever grateful.

 

When Life Gets You Down...Remember the Good

lengthy post on the horizon so watch out-and don't say i didn't forewarn you ahead of time :)

in this world wide web of blogging, it is so easy to get overwhelmed, sad, and confused as to why some people say the things they do. i've seen countless bloggers get upset over a rude comment some negative nancy just had to post on their site or say about them behind their back...i can't help but find it fascinating that there are so many individuals out there who intentionally seek to harm others-but why? to make themselves feel better? to hurt others? for a good laugh? that is one thing i don't understand, and i doubt i ever will.
luckily, {and i should totaly be knocking on wood here} i haven't had much of those types of experiences in the past 3.5 years since i began blogging.

a lot of what i post on my blog is personal, and summarizes what is going on in my life, and i think it helps deal with some of the emotions i encounter throughout this crazy roller coaster... having an outlet to air these feelings really helps cope with the ups and downs and i think communicating the good as well as the bad is all a part in showing that we are all human, we all make mistakes, we all have bad days, and we all struggle.
last weekend, i posted a tweet and i had some friends/fellow bloggers email me saying that they really appreciated what i wrote because they needed some positivity...i assure you, it's nothing prolific by any stretch of the imagination, but this is what it said:
"it's time for people to grow up and move on. sad to see you're dwelling in the past while we're living in the present and looking to the future."

i have had obstacles i've had to overcome...people saying untrue things about me and my husband-acting like they know who we are at this stage in our life, and trying to belittle and say rude things about us, our family, our future-but it's just like our moms taught us throughout our adolescent years-"that which does not kill you only makes you stronger". it's almost as though we've ventured back to middle school for some unknown reason.

to those individuals, i find it strange that they read my blog in order to find out about our lives...to me, that says a lot more about what they find entertaining and how they occupy their free time and it baffles me. i certainly don't seek out information on those i don't care for to find out what is going on in their lives, for that seems to me like taking a step back and honestly, people like that simply aren't worth anyone's time. 

however, on the contrary, there are countless people out there that are thoughtful and take time to offer a kind word or a thank you...it's fun for others to be able to take a small peak into a blogger's life and some have told me they have been positively affected by my optimism, or the advice i offer, or my attitude towards life. to me, that makes this whole thing worth it. to read your comments and emails, it's like i've gained a whole new outlook and i have found that i can maybe help someone who is going through a difficult time, or offer my opinion on how to deal with setbacks we all face. in this world of so much negativity, i'm glad i can offer a glass-half-full kind of perspective. if i am able to put a smile on just one person's face at the end of the day, then i have succeeded and opening up a brief snapshot of me is most certainly worth the small bit of negativity that others try to project.

just remember to be strong, be kind, and always be you...

thanks for listening to me babble...i hope each and every one of you have a WONDERFUL day!!

Thirsty Thursday and Beauty Must Haves!

I need Jeff and I need to venture to a Sounds baseball game this weekend so I can partake in all baseball-related food...beers, hot dogs, and ice cream in mini helmets would be lovely right about now. This is cleverly entitled Thirsty Thursday because I am thinking about the crazy week I've had and how I could use a drink {or two} to get me to Friday afternoon...I present to you some new favorites of mine--that are calorie conscious too!

Skinnygirl Margaritas--via Bethenny Frankel...love her and love her drinks!

100 calories per drink=amazing

Champagne Pomegranate Cocktail via My Recipes

125 calories per serving

Salty Chihuahua via Eating Well

188 calories per serving

Slushy Watermelon Mojitos via My Recipes

119 calories per serving

I love how I am seeing all of these blogs featuring their favorite summer beauty trends and such so I am here to offer my two cents as well on the certain items I just can't live without:

Alterna Caviar Hair Treatment--helping tame my damaged ends from all that straightening

Smashbox Photo Finish Foundation Primer...this stuff works wonders and helps to eliminate shiny skin on hot summer days 

Clairol Shimmer Lights Shampoo--amazing hair color system that helps brighten your roots between colorings for us blondes

Australian Gold Sunscreen with Bronzer...gives you that glow while still protecting your skin

There you have it!! Now tell me what are some of your favorite cocktails and beauty products??
We all need suggestions for new fun!!

Bye Bye Brain Cells

Tell me you got suckered in to this season's of The Bachelorette just like I did so I can avoid the embarrassment of being a total love sap? Yep, it happened again... OK so I was in the middle of whether I liked Ashley H. during Brad's season, but I think she is adorable with her new darker hue and I think she learned a thing or two from her first stint on TV. She's got some {what seem to be} great guys vying for her attention, and some initial frontrunners in my book are: 

Ryan P--AKA Solar Man
{hot, sweet, successful, ready for commitment--sounds like a winner to me!}

William--AKA The Man Who Sells

{total hottie with an infectious smile...he's going to woo her I do believe}

Then there is weirdo Jeff {AKA Mask Man}, Bentley {sounds like a dog's name which is good because it looks like he is one}, and then Ames {AKA Overachiever/Weirdo}...yes, I'll be tuning in each and every week to see the cards unfold.

In other news, while I was perusing for fun honeymoon necessities at Victoria's Secret yesterday, I was trying on some items to which the helpful associate inquired to whether or not I had been measured recently...since losing weight I hadn't thought my bra size had changed at all, but after a little consult in the fitting room, this girl has been wearing the wrong bra size like the other 70% of women in America...oops. Today, I am all smiles in some new skivies and know I am wearing something that fits, doesn't ride up, and is actually comfortable and cute--what are the odds? Lesson here--get measured!

What's on for tonight? We're having our pastor over for dinner so we can have our last pre-wedding counseling session and then relaxing for the rest of the evening...I need to finish reading for book club, work on the endless amounts of laundry {how can 2 people rack up so much?}, watch the season finale of Pregnant in Heels, and then hit the sack early!

Wedding Wednesday...You've Got Mail {and Clarifications}

OK so I didn't think my last post regarding "the diet" would stimulate so much conversation...I am glad to know that people actually care what I have to say, so thanks for listening friends. With that being said, I want to clarify what I meant by my diet-- we all have a certain way we want to look on our wedding, right? I hope I am not being superficial here, but I think we want to look like the "best version of ourselves" or that is how I envision it myself.

I am not BY ANY MEANS trying to lose a bunch of weight...I am at a place where I am happy with the way my body looks, but I do believe that toning and firming right before our nuptuals AND honeymoon {i.e. week long of being in a bathing suit, eating hoards of gourmet food, and an endless supply of alcoholic beverages} seems like a good enough reason for me. I hope I didn't offend anyone, but just trying to bookmark my personal wedding journey in case others need advice, tips/tricks, helpful motivation, etc. I do thank you whole-heartedly for all the thoughtful suggestions and whatnot. =)

Also, my question yesterday asked if you ladies were aware of bridal portraits...I am SHOCKED and in awe that I do believe this is a mostly southern thing. I did receive some feedback stating that some midwest ladies partake in this blessed photo event, but I think this occasion is primarily aimed for us southern belles. So what is it for those of you who are unaware?

In generic terms, it's a trial/run-through...it's to show what you'll look like come wedding day. You get your hair styled and your makeup done by your beauty team, put on your wedding gown and accessories {once all final fittings and alterations are complete}, have your florist create your wedding bouquet, and then join up with your photographer(s) to take pictures. For me, this was an EASY decision.

First of all, my parents want to frame a portrait to have on-site at the reception...this way, your guests can see the details of your wedding dress/veil/etc. It's also so they can display it at their house once the wedding is over. My poor father is oh so excited to have another huge portrait of me lining the walls of their house--haha. And finally, the most important reason...this gives you the opportunity to look at yourself and see how your hair, makeup, and overall "wedding day look" appears in pictures. I know lots of friends who have changed elements of what they had originally wanted based off their portraits so I know this will be a sigh of relief for me and a taste of what I hope to look like on June 11th. I hope this answers your questions ladies. If not, feel free to ask- I am an open book.  

So--today was a BIG milestone day for us as the wedding is coming to fruition... this morning Jeff and I had a little breakfast and went downtown to handcancel AND mail out our wedding invitations. Talk about a big sigh of relief... I have agonized over these little pieces of paper for months and I am so excited that our family, friends, and honored guests will be opening these envelopes VERY soon! Can't wait to show you all the end result--once they are delivered of course!

Wedding Wednesday...The Etiquette

One day, maybe I'll write a weekly newspaper column about wedding etiquette and the in's and out's of being a good guest/bride/bridesmaid/etc, but until that day, I wanted to share some lessons I've learned these past 14 months that could just help some of you out...
{and by no means am I claiming to be the "end all" of etiquette, however, after being in a number of my friends' weddings, attending countless shindigs, and now working through the final chapters of planning my own soiree, I think I may be able to offer some helpful advice/tips and tricks...hopefully}

Number 1: If you do not receive "and guest" on your wedding invitation, you shouldn't be bringing a +1. Some people-myself included-are limited to the number of people they can invite to their weddings/rehearsals/showers/parties/etc. This is a delicate issue for some people, and the way I look at it for my own guest list planning was this...if you have a longtime significant other that we have met OR know personally, you get to bring them--the more the merrier! However, if you're just wanting to bring a date so you don't have to wedding crash, leave that for the afterparty please. This goes the same for children...if they aren't included on the invitation, {inner envelope is where their names would be included} then it's time to find a good babysitter for the festivities. Sorry to say, this isn't a daycare party.

Number 2: They send you a Response Card for a reason. Contrary to popular belief, response cards and reply envelopes do matter ladies and gentlemen. To simply throw this away and show up is rude, and just plain mean. These friends/family/colleagues have invited you to their wedding for a reason, and you should extend the same kindness and send in your RSVP-by the due date. Factoring in a headcount for final food/alcohol/seating/etc is extremely important not to mention costly so please please please...send these back in a timely fashion!

Number 3: If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. No offense, but wedding planning puts you in a bubble--an out-of-body experience where all you can dream about is flowers galore, feeding cake to your cute new hubby, dancing with all your friends to your favorite wedding band, and yes, the list goes on and on. If the person planning their wedding asks you for advice, by all means, don't hold back and be truthful in your answers, but if you feel as though you should offer your two cents any time you get the opportunity, please refrain. We all have different tastes and each person's wedding should reflect their personality, not your vision. Don't rain on their parade!!

Number 4: The Registry Information. This pertinent info should ONLY be included on party and shower invitations and/or wedding websites, not the actual wedding invitation. It's like you're advertising your guests to bring gifts to your nuptuals--and that just sounds greedy.

Number 5: The People Who Can't Arrive On Time. If you arrive at the church during the procession, you should wait until the bride has gone down the aisle before entering. Please don't peek through the doors to watch because you'll absolutely show up in her photos, which no doubt will make for an unhappy bride {not something anyone wants!} If you are late for the ceremony, you should walk down an outside aisle and find a seat quickly and quietly.

Number 6 {and this is the BIG one friends}: Unless you are THE bride, any shade of white OR ivory is off limits and completely inapprorpriate to wear to ANY wedding event. I have a feeling I may get some slack for this one, but it's true... your friend/family member/other important person has most likely waited a long time to be a "vision in white" so please just simply leave it alone. People will notice and it won't be pretty--trust me, I have seen it before with my own two eyes, and I couldn't help but say 'what was she thinking?'

So friends, we're coming into the home stretch here...I can't believe we only have 66 more days until we tie the knot! Last weekend, I was able to knockout a huge amount of my to-do list...ordered cocktail napkins with our custom monogram, finished and mailed all my thank-you notes for shower gifts {before the 10 day deadline!}, and ordered the groomsmen gifts. This week, I am putting the finishing touches on all the invitations--only 20 more to finish the calligraphy on, and then they will go out to our guests next week--OH SO EXCITED!!

This weekend, we're headed to Knoxville for our couple's shower, thrown by my two best friends and their husbands as well as my MOH's parents...I cannot wait!! They all know how to throw a great party and Jeff and I can't wait to see some old and new friends in our other home away from home city.

Happy Wednesday friends...I'm off to diffuse some not-so-great news I was delivered this morning. I think this may be a cupcake for lunch kinda day with the way it's starting off--deep breaths, deep breaths! Love to you all ;)

You Asked/I Answered

For some of you, this post is a long time coming so my apologies... when I get questions from readers, I usually stockpile them until I can do one post and answer them all at one time--this is usually beneficial so I get a moment to actually think about my response before answering so here it goes:

1. How do you constantly get yourself up in the morning and workout? Truth be told, I do have a hard time waking up at the crack of dawn to get my booty to the gym, however, I have found this one little sure-fire trick that never lets me down... I leave my alarm clock {aka iPhone} on its charger in our bathroom which makes me get up--no snooze button for me! Try this, it works!

2. What does your regular workout consist of? I usually try to switch my routine up a bit, but since the wedding is right around the corner I have high hopes in exactly what I want which equals--toned legs, mid-section, and arms-HA! With that being said, I do 3 to 4 days of cardio {3 to 4 miles at a 9:15 to 9:30 pace} and then do 2 days of strength training... arms, legs, core, abs, and stretches. When possible, I'll jog around the neighborhood and try to make it to a fun aerobic class, too. 

3. Where do you find your clothes? Though I find some things online at a few favorite retailers: ModCloth, Lulus, JCrew, Shop Ruche, Francescas, Dillards, etc... most of the things I buy come from browsing the racks at stores here in Nashville: TJ Maxx, Blush, Old Navy, Target, Gap, and Macys. I find it easier to browse online for inspiration and then try to recreate looks based on specific items you find in stores.

4. How do always find things to write about on your blog? This is a funny one because to tell you the truth, I get writer's block just like everyone else...whenever I come up with fun ideas, I write them down in a notebook and then when I am having a difficult time thinking of something worth reading, I come back and ta-dah, a blog post is born!

5. Where do you find the pictures you use on your blog? Granted I bet some people wouldn't be happy as I forget to give credit to where I get pictures {oops! sorry}, but I have recently been accepted to Pinterest--an online picture gallery of sorts which is where I find the majority of the quotes, typography, and all sorts of lovely snapshots for your viewing pleasure.

6. What do you think you'll do with all your free time after the wedding? I am a constantly-on-the-go type person, so I doubt I'll slow down too terribly much--hey, you only live once--but Jeff and I are already planning trips for next year...NYC with friends in January and then Italy with the parents next summer so I'll be working on those fun vacations, and then I'll most likely begin working on a potential business plan for opening my own business one day.

7. Where do you find inspiration for decorating your home? My friends will laugh at this as they know I am obsessed with Pottery Barn, but yes a lot of our decor comes from my favorite home store. I can't help it--they had me at hello. But on the other hand, I love perusing websites and blogs like House Beautiful and Better Homes and Gardens...check out the blogs I have listed on my sidebar--they are wonderful and help when you're trying to decorate on a budget!

That's it for this round of 20 questions--if I forgot to answer your question, my apologies, but let me know and I'll make sure to do so next go-around... Happy Thursday friends!! This woman's gotta go back to the grind, spend some time planning events for work, and then venturing to dinner with Candice tonight--yay!!

Top 2 Tuesday... What I've Learned

Even as we mature, we are constantly learning things... learning about the world around us, learning about our friends and family, and most importantly, learning about ourselves--that is why I absolutely love Taylor's topic this week...

The Top 2 Things My Parents/Grandparents
Have Taught Me

1. If you fall, pick yourself back up and try again! Winners never quit and I am certainly not a quitter... from multiple setbacks throughout my childhood, adolescence, and even now as an adult, I've realized you're surely going to not succeed at every single thing you attempt, yet you need to try again... "can't" is not a word within my vocabulary

2. Do unto others as you would have done to you... cardinal rule, right? We're taught this at an early age, yet some still cannot grasp this simple value--if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all--wish well for others and do not yearn for someone else's life...you have no idea what their journey is all about and things aren't always as they seem  

Other important things my family has taught me are that southern girls don't sweat--we glisten, a little mascara and lipgloss goes a long way, the man is always supposed to take out the trash, a handwritten thank-you note is still a necessity, to always remember it's better to give than to receive, that if you really love a man you want to hit him in the head with a frying pan at least once a day {advice from both Mom and Gran}, and that if you give your life to God and thank Him for all his blessings, your life will continue to be blessed beyond measure... =)

Charming...and Stylish Details

Last night, I continued the "winter cleaning" as I am calling it, because let's face it, due to inclement weather, I am stuck at home most of the evenings and I am trying to accomplish anything other than watching mindless TV... I decided to go through my stack of old magazines and organize what I want to keep, what I want to recycle, and what I want to toss.

Southern Living has some of my favorite recipes, so I simply cut them out and am going to buy a fun binder to keep all of them in for easy reference! This will make finding new favorites so much easier than having to skim through old issues...

While I was cutting out decorating ideas and all the holiday tablescapes, I stumbled upon an article that I thought was perfect to share on my blog... cleverly entitled "How to Write a Charming Thank-You Note" {via September 2010 issue}. In this day and age, so many people forget to write handwritten notes and I thought I would take a moment to mention a few specifics to make it easier, and more fun:

1. Start with the date and salutation: Send your note, written in black ink, within a week of receiving a gift. P.S. If you pass the 1 week mark, don't stress it--etiquette is actually 2 weeks so they'll forgive you once they open that beautiful note anyways =)

2. Say thanks right off the bat: Be specific about why you are writing the note. If you’re thanking someone for a monetary gift, refer to their “generosity” rather than mentioning the amount.
3. Compliment the kind gesture: Don’t be afraid to go over the top—everyone loves an effusive compliment, as long as it’s heartfelt.
4. Allude to the future: Anticipate another get-together, or if you’re writing about a gift, be sure to tell them how you plan to use it.
5. Finish with sincere regards: Reiterate your gratitude, then close the letter on an intimate note, signing your first and last name. Don’t forget to proofread before you postmark! {We all have a final touch we like to add--mine for instance is "Best" because it can be sent to a number of people in a lot of different circumstances...not too personal, not too formal, but use a salutation that works for you}

And I wanted to send a special thank you to both blogging friends Teaching in Heels as well as M at I Made My Bed for passing on the "Stylish Blogger Award" to me...I have my days where I don't believe I am stylish whatsoever, but that is so sweet of both of you--so then I have to share 7 stylish things about myself/my philosophies/etc...

1. I love to mix brown and black together--yes, I know, some people would never do this, but mixing neutrals together works well {in my opinion} and it offers some contrast--throw some gray in there, and you're golden in my book!

2. Fashion icons I adore include Reese Witherspoon, Jessica Alba, and Jennifer Aniston...classic and tailored, yet refined and hip...they aren't afraid to throw in color either, which I heart!

3. If I could switch places with one person in the fashion industry for one single day, I would most certainly choose Anna Wintour--yes, she is the woman from "The Devil Wears Prada", but that woman has the fashion world at her fingertips and I would die if I were able to play dress up for a day from the infamous Vogue closet.

4. My favorite thing to wear--which will come as no surprise to most of you--are dresses... they're feminine, fun, show off your figure, yet can be dressed up or down depending on the occasion...not to mention they are the most comfortable garments to me. In going through my closet recently, I had to count them and I had more than 100...yes, I know, a bit ridic...

5. If you're wanting new highlooks at a fraction of the cost, subscribe to Rue La La, HauteLook, Gilt, Ideeli, and any other fashion feature website. You can get this season's look for up to 50% off which helps our money go a little farther...

6. I am obsessed with fingernail polish... if I have nothing on my fingers, I feel naked... it always helps you look "complete" in my eyes, especially when people see your hands all the time--give me some OPI You Don't Know Jacques or Pinking of You and I am all set.

7. And most of all... have fun! Shop around your closet for fun mix and matching pieces--you don't always have to look "matchy matchy"... brighten your wardrobe with fun accessories {jewelry, scarves, purses} that don't break the bank, but still incorporate current looks with timeless pieces

Tidbits of Fun and Back to Training Tuesday!

Random post in no order whatsoever... jumping around on the page if you will:

1. I was so encouraged to get new running shoes for 2011... however I am sad to "retire" my old Asics--these puppies helped me finish my first 1/2 marathon and let me get to 550 miles last year... sad to sad goodbye, but excited for these new lovelies on my feet:

2. Meg and I are starting a book club this year and I couldn't be more excited... we've never done this before so it will definitely be a work-in-progress, but we're hoping to spend more quality time together with the girls and get our minds away from the TV and focused on more important things! Our first read is going to be Frances Chan's "Crazy Love"

3. I spoiled myself yesterday at Anthropologie and bought the most adorable ruffled dress... it's my very first honeymoon purchase I am so excited to start doing some fun shopping for wedding events--woo hoo!

4. Tonight, we're headed to one of our fav resturants in town to celebrate Mrs. Rachel Gray's birthday... even though she's an AU grad, I can't help but love that girl. And P.S. she kicks butt in any and EVERY game we ever play ;)

5. I--like every other twenty-something woman in America--tuned into ABC last night to see Mr. Brad Womack as the new Bachelor {again!}. Obviously from the 2 hour episode, we know that Deanna is still not over him dumping her though she is engaged to someone else, and ABC selected some weirdos to keep us on our toes this season... vampires, funeral directors, and manscapers--oh my! Front runners in my opinion include Emily, Ashley S {the nanny from NYC with that amazing gold one strap dress}, and Michelle.

6. I am going to reconvene my Training Day Tuesdays... with the new year and everyone on workout/health overload, I thought this would be a great time to start this over in 2011--not to mention, someone is in major wedding workout mode over here and I need to hold myself accountable.

Here's my tips for making the most out of every workout at the gym:

• Rise and shine early in the morning for your best workout--I promise, once you do something 10 times it becomes a habit, and it's far easier to get it over with in the AM rather than after work when you're already tired
• Don't forget the music!! My iPod is my necessity to run or else I am focused on everything but my workout--high energy music {think pop, rap, etc} is the best to get your adrenaline flowing and get you ready to pump some iron
• Dont be afraid to ask for help. the people who work at the gym are there for a reason. If you're unsure what muscle groups you should be targeting for specific trouble areas... ASK THEM! Dont be intimidated--it'll help you in the long run.
• Maintain a positive attitude... the weight won't melt off overnight, but after lots of time spent fine tuning these muscles and areas, I promise you'll see a difference in the way your clothes fit and how you feel when you stand in front of a mirror. This is the biggest payoff for me =)
• Grab a buddy! If you just can't do it alone, then don't. Grab a friend and head to the gym for a fun cardio or dance class and make it all about time with your friends!
• Dress the part. I find that if I dress the part, I feel better about myself when I workout. Workout clothes can be prciey, yet I find that my favorites are the ones I stocked up on from Target and Old Navy--pick pieces you can wear a lot and what you find comfortable...for me, this includes skorts/tight capris, tanks, a fun colored sportsbra, and a lightweight half zip jacket when it's chilly.  Here are some newbies from Old Navy: