I Survived Two Under Two...Among Other Things

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Some of you with small ones are laughing at the title of this post I'm fairly certain. It's true, I survived the two under two madness and I lived to tell about it. Honestly, sometimes I think I can take anything on now that I have gone through this chaos...maybe a Wonder Woman mentality.
I'm an open book, a word vomiter of sorts when it comes to telling it like it is (most of the time) and I try to be honest and upfront about my experiences...the good ones, the bad ones, and the ugly ones, too (though the pretty ones are the most fun to share). 
I have been thinking of writing this post for a few months now and I finally just bit the bullet and said who cares what people say...this is my experience, my life, and I feel like I owe it to you to tell the truth.
This past year has been the hardest of my life. Not just because of babies, and moving, and starting a business, but because it's been rough on my emotions, my happiness, my marriage, and my spirituality, among other things.
Having two under two has been difficult...with a husband that travels, a business that I was building 100% on my own, as well as life's other intricacies to balance and juggle, it's been a year I will never forget.
One. People Look at You Like You're Crazy
This is when it's really funny and you can see the fear on people's faces when they tell you how cute your kids are, but then ask how old they are...when I say they are 15 months apart, it's like a deer in headlights and people look at us like we are aliens. I know, yes they are VERY close in age, and then they ask "was that planned?" Let's face it, I've learned you can't really plan for these things, but God had it in His plan. Is this how I saw it happening? Hell to the no. Would I have it any other way? Hell to the no.
Two. Playmates for Life
I have a stepbrother, but he lived with his mother growing up, so for the most part I have lived as an only child the majority of my life. Last week, I saw all these people on social media bragging about their siblings on Sibling Day (I swear there is a holiday for everything these days) and thought to myself, I may not have a true sibling, but my babies do, and neither of them will ever remember their life without the other. That might bring me more joy than anything else. They have a built-in playmate/best friend/partner-in-crime for life and you know how I feel about family...there is simply nothing more important.
Three. Constant Chaos...AKA The Circus
It's chaotic in our world, there is no doubt about it. Whenever we go somewhere, we invade the premises and the calmness goes out the door. Just the other day we went to our friends' house for their annual Masters Party and it looked like we were travelling overnight for how much stuff we had to bring over...diapers, toys, treats, and all the other "necessities" we needed for 4+ hours outside the home. Someone commented on how many bags I had (3 to be exact) and I jokingly said "we travelled light today", which is true...that was a good day. It's not quiet at our house and I have a feeling it won't be for a very long time, but the sweet sounds of tiny feet running and little giggles and laughs give me more joy than one could fathom.
Four...I Did It, and You Can Too
I want this to serve as a PSA to those of you out there who are currently pregnant with #2 with another toddler to run after, and to those naysayers who think we're nuts for having two under two. It's not easy, but it's worth it and we came out of it alive. It was really hard on Jeff and I and our marriage had a hard year, I will say that, but now we are SO in the fun stage, because our girls are starting to play together more often, Carson follows Caroline everywhere so that helps keep her occupied, and in general, life is pretty great.
Pappy says it best..."every family is crazy" and we're proud of it :) 

- 47 Comments

  1. So so true, friend. Hudson & Ella are 15 months apart also. I got those crazy looks for a long time. Now I just get the question if they are twins. :)

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  2. Thanks for the post. I waited a while to have my first and might not have the luxury of being able to space them out much more if we have a second child....this is encouraging.

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  3. Thank you so much for posting this. We are currently pregnant with our second and they will be 16 months apart. After announcing a honeymoon baby and then another baby soon after, it is amazing how ugly people can be! Little loves are always Gods plan regardless of the timing. Pappy's saying couldn't be more perfect :)

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  4. Man I wish we lived in the same city - we could take our circus all around town! Love and miss you - I'm always here to talk to about the chaos, joys and "Wonder Woman" moments! Also, you balance it beautifully friend. :)

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  5. My oldest two are 4 and 5 now (and we just had our third a week ago) but we finally had to learn to just embrace the crazy. I told our neighbors there are some families that are all nice and calm and then there are families like ours where it's total chaos and you know.... it's ok. We made it through and are still alive so whatever works ;)

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  6. Thanks for keeping it 'real' with this post! We are expecting baby #2 in June and we will have 2 under 19 months. Most people already look at me like I am crazy and this baby hasn't even arrived. I am already anticipating the challenges we will face, but hearing you say it is all worth it gives me reassurance.
    Way to go Mama!!

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  7. And it is just going to get even more fun each day!! (and louder and crazier and everything else!) Reid and Sawyer are just 12 months apart so I definitely understand the crazy looks and questions from people. I'm with you- I wouldn't have it any other way! Embrace the chaos :)

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  8. I need to send this to my sister-in-law - she's pregnant with her second baby and her children will be 12 1/2 months apart!! Go you for not only taking care of the two kids but starting a business as well - if you can do all that, you can do anything!

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  9. I loved this post. The timing could not have been better as we're expecting #2 later this year. Thanks for "keeping it real"! I love reading your posts for encouragement!!

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  10. You go girl! My first two are 13 month and 1 day apart...Irish Twins. And, I proceeded to have two more. You do what you can to get through the day. I promise, it gets easier and you'll forget this hard "season" of life. Love on those babies! I look back and wish I had one more day with the little ones, who are all now teens.

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  11. You are such an inspiration!! I don't even have kids... not even pregnant yet & I wonder/worry "how the heck do people do it!?" I guess it just falls in line with those things of "you just do it" There's no questioning or thinking about it, you just do it!

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  12. This was a great post. I have a daughter who is turning two next week and I am due with my second little lady in August. Although we won't have two under two the whole toddler and baby thing has me a little nervous. So it is nice to hear honesty from other mom's out there!

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  13. This is awesome! My little girl will be 1 in June and her baby sister is coming in august! I will be living by your blog!

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  14. I just posted my two under two post today. A turns 2 on Friday and while i know that won't change the way things go and are handled it does seem like some sort of mama medal.. I survived! Great post and yes, its not puppies and rainbows all the time :)

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  15. I loved this post. My sister and I are 13 months apart and she's my best friend in the world. I have no idea what I'd do without her. Much like your experience raising two under 2, it hasn't always been perfect. (Goodness did we fight as kids!) But it's a relationship I'm forever grateful for. My brother is 5.5 years younger but we love him just as much! Siblings are such a gift! B won't be an only child forever. I can't imagine denying her that special relationship I share with my brother & sister.

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  16. Thank you for this post! I am about to have three under two (the twins will be 18m when this new little guy arrives) and I just keep reminding myself that other people have survived a baby and a toddler and I can to!

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  17. I love this! My sisters are 15 months apart from each other. They are 14 years and 15 years right now, and watching them together just melts my heart. Life can be so hard for girls in those years, and the fact that they have each other as a security blanket of sorts gives me and my mom so much relief. I have loved watching them grow up, and always wish I had a sibling closer in age so I could share that bond. Though they are total 180s of each other in the personality and interest arenas, they still always think of the other and include one another in all aspects of their lives. IDK how my mom survived their toddler years, but it is so worth it!

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  18. I am sending this to my friend - her daughter just turned 1 in March and then they found out they were pregnant again! I know she freaked a little since it wasn't "planned", but like you said, God has a plan. You put it so eloquently. Your girls are beautiful!

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  19. It is so rewarding at the end of the day to know everyone is alive and we have another day to count our many blessings!

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  20. I'm due in October and my babies will be 16 months apart. It was actually somewhat planned haha. I grew up an only child so I wanted them to grow up playing together. Bring on the crazy!

    Elise

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  21. My boys are three years apart and we are still the circus :). I think that is just having multiple kids in general. And I love the part about having a sibling. I'm an only child and I am so glad my boys will have each other (and a little sister soon - and maybe another a couple years from now). I pray every night they understand what they have in each other. Unfortunately my parents families were larger and the siblings have had multiple fallings out. So much of the conversation between my husband and I about raising our boys is how to teach them to understand what a gift it is to have each other.

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  22. I LOVE this post. Odds are pretty good we'll have two under two so I'm bookmarking this for sure. Being a mama is hard work, but it pays back in an eternity of blessings!!! xo

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  23. Beautiful Post. How blessed you are to have such a wonderful family :)

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  24. I love this post. I only have one child but I know what you mean about it being hard on a marriage. Suddenly all your attention is on your children and you kinda forget to focus on each other. Glad to hear you made it out alive ;)

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  25. Such a cute post! My siblings and I were all really close in age and it's really like raising a herd. But of course, I wouldn't have it any other way either...we experienced so much of life together through school, sports, traveling, etc. It was super fun!

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  26. I just loved this Natasha! You are an amazing mama! I don't know how you do it and look so good doing it :) We will have our next baby pretty close (hopefully) for the same reasons. I want Scarlett to have a playmate since my brother was 12 years older than me and I felt like an only child most of the time :) I missed having a sibling to play with!

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  27. Love love love this post. Thanks so much for being such an encouragement!!!

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  28. Great post! I have an 8 month old and we are starting to try for our second very soon :) So encouraging :) Thank You! www.chasingdreamsandcatchinglife.blogspot.com

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  29. Wonderful, honest post! You (and mothers of two under two or more) definitely deserve extra medals! The relationship they will have though- that's a lifetime. And I love the part about they won't remember a time without each other. * heart melts *

    xx Viv at JoieDeViv

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  30. We had 2 under 2. Life is crazy, but its also awesome!

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  31. When I get stressed with DH and the baby, I always think about one of my best friends. When her triplet girls were 17 months old, she had a 4th (unplanned) daughter. 4 under two! Whew! Anyway, I loved this post. It always feels so good to acknowledge that one had a rough few months or year. I don't think you can have that recognition until you are out of it, but you got to give yourself some grace. Xoxo

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  32. THANK YOU! After the past few days I've been having, I really needed to read this. I also have 2 little girls 15 months apart. My oldest will be 2 in June and they are just starting to interact. It is so amazing to watch and a relief when I can get little things done. Life is total chaos and some days are much better than others. Its ridiculous how many people are borderline rude when they find out how close our kids are and that we may not be done adding to our family. It is so refreshing to hear the honest truth from a mama who know what it's like!

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  33. My siblings and I are the exact opposite of this. They are 6 and 10 years older than me. I often think about how fun it would have been if we were closer in age. Carson and Caroline will truly grow up to be best friends!

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  34. This is such a sweet post. I love it! I have a son who is three and a half, and a baby girl on the way. I know things will be a little crazy for a while, but I just keep daydreaming about all the times we'll be snuggled up together. : )

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  35. I'm sure it must be hard but you are living this infertile mama's dream!!! I always wanted to have kids and to have them VERY close in age. However, God has His own plans and we adopted our darling girl. Hopefully our finances will allow u to adopt again (very soon if I have anything to say about it!) or maybe God will bless us with a viable full term pregnancy with a healthy baby.

    Thank you for being honest.

    Atparsons.blogspot.com

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  36. Amen girl! Mine are 17 months apart so I got to graduate from this club as well. It is crazy all the extra attention is brings. When they're babies you get the rude "was is planned" comments (it's never really asked as a question is it) and then the "wow you're brave" commentary as they get older. My favorite thing now is being able to drop the I have a two year old AND a three year old bomb whenever people complain about trying toddlers.

    Mine are successfully best friends and I love watching them discover the world together. We get to do everything together when they're both ready and that feels special to create a close family bond.
    I always tell people I truly

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  37. My brother and I are 10 months apart and I can't believe people still ask if babies were planned. Whether the baby was planned or not doesn't matter! I just don't get people sometimes!

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  38. As someone going through this right now, I can totally relate. It's crazy, but enjoyable at the same time. Do I wish they'd clean up their messes and sleep through the night, yes, but I love these little monsters.

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  39. What a lovely honest post, Natasha! I am sure you sang directly to the hearts of all the momma's out there experiencing this exact thing right now. Mine are 23 months apart which seems pretty "typical" but I would get quizzed all the time about having "two in diapers". I guess people will always have their opinions! Congrats on raising your girls and raising them well.

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  40. Oh Natasha, I so love this post. I love your honesty and your spin on things. You are so right, these two will always have each other and be the best of friends. I think about that as well. My closest sibling in age is 4 years younger than me, so we were never as close as I wish we were, but Ryan and his brother are only 16 months apart and the bestest friends ever. I'm jealous of that. We wanted our kids close together for that reason. You are doing such an awesome job with the girls and with everything else. Such an inspiration to us all!

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  41. Wonderful, honest post! We had three under three with our girls 15 months apart and our boy 20 months behind. My favorite comment is always - you are done having babies aren't you? Our oldest is 4 and its a handful but also a heart full for sure! It is hard on a marriage, for all of us but knowing its Gods plan makes the difference. Blessings to you and your sweet family.

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  42. Thank you so much for sharing this! I have a 4 month old and just one baby has been hard for us. I am so scared for when we add another one to the mix, because of just how hard it is. Like you said, they are worth it and your girls will be close forever. Thanks for sharing the ugly truth, I think it's important as women that we don't pretend it's always sunshine and roses. You are an incredible mama! Congrats on all of your success!

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  43. I LOVED this post. My girls are 16 months apart and we aren't quite to where you are yet (Audriana is only 5 months old) but I am SO excited for them to be able to play together and grow up together. It is tough and there are days I wish I had a clone when both girls want to be carried around and I have to do things around the house with a baby on each hip :) But it is SO worth it - I call it beautiful chaos!
    loveandlifesimplified.blogspot.com

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  44. This post is so helpful! I'm about to become a 2 under 2 mother and this reality check really helps!!!


    http://scaifebabywatch.blogspot.com

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  45. Love this post and you are so right...the bond your girls have, being so close in age, will be priceless!

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  46. While I probably won't have 2 under 2, we probably will have two babies just at 2 years apart depending on when #2 makes his/her arrival. The thing I'm struggling with the most is having to split my time between 2. How do you deal with that? I know that is an issue all moms of more than 1 child deal with, but it'll be new territory for me. Thanks!

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