Guest Post...The BFF Meg on All Things Etiquette

Thursday, May 9, 2013

We bring you this regularly scheduled blogging post with breaking news...I FINALLY talked my best friend/aka godmother to my babies, Meg, into guest posting here on the old blog while I'm away at the beach. We have been discussing this for some time now, and I was so glad when she said she would write in my absence...so without further adieu, here she is:
Hi everyone! I’m Meg, also known as Natasha’s BFF. I’m so excited to be guest posting today for Natasha. While I’m a big fan of reading blogs, I don’t have my own so it’s fun to be on this side of the screen!
When Natasha asked me to guest post I started racking my brain for ideas. After much discussion, we landed on the topic of etiquette. I would, by no means, consider myself an etiquette expert. However, my mom is very traditional when it comes to etiquette and I love that she instilled those values in me from a young age. Etiquette can be a sensitive subject, but I want to talk about a few things that people have recently asked me or I've seen people do that just make me think, “ didn't your mother teach you better?”
Like I said, etiquette can be a touchy topic, so I’m sure not everyone will agree with what I say, and I completely understand that. But this is what I've grown up with and what I found to be the standard in the south and also according to actual the “experts.”
RSVP
We’ll start with an easy one J DO IT! If someone sends you an invitation that asks you to respond, whether by “RSVP” or “Regrets Only,” by all means respond.  And by the date requested. I know it can be hard to remember once you've put it on your fridge, but as a rule of thumb I will not put an invitation on the refrigerator until I've responded. This helps me make sure that I don’t forget. And this goes for electronic invitations, too!
Thank You Cards  
For some people thank you cards can be a daunting task, but don’t make them overly complicated. Especially so overly complicated that you don’t do them. For birthdays, Christmas, showers, or other events give yourself one to two weeks to send them. Again, the sooner the better so you don’t forget. As for wedding gifts, the standard rule is three months for gifts given at the wedding. I know for some people, myself included, three months can be hard especially depending on the size of your wedding. But these people were kind enough to give a gift, make sure you’re kind enough to thank them.
Cell Phones
I get it, you’re important and people are tweeting and emailing you constantly, but if you’re going to be on the phone the whole time we’re at lunch or dinner,  well that just makes for a long meal! As someone who works in a field that is 24/7, I do understand it can be hard not to check your phone constantly. But there aren’t many times when you can’t go at least an hour without checking it. If you are expecting an important email, text, or call, just let the people who you’re with know. At least then you’re not acting like you’re bored and need to check Instagram every five minutes.
Shower Gifts vs. Wedding Gifts
I’ve had a few people ask me lately if you’re supposed to give a wedding gift if you also gave a shower gift. There are many varying opinions to this and many varying circumstances to consider. My short answer is yes. I think of the shower gift as a gift for the shower and the wedding gift as a gift for the wedding. If you’re not sure that you can afford both, then split the amount you are able to afford between the two gifts. With that said, if you’re invited to multiple showers (which you shouldn’t be unless you’re family or in the wedding…another topic), you’re not expected to bring a gift to both showers. There are also a lot of people who travel from afar multiple times for one wedding’s events. In that situation I would just do what you think is best. If you’re close enough with the bride, just let her know!

And a few “quickies” to leave you with:
- Introductions: Do them! I know it’s easy to forget, but try to always remember to introduce people to each other at events or social gatherings. But make sure to call them the correct name, haha.
- Being Late: I understand we can all be late every now and again. But for those people who are constantly late…c’mon now.
- Giving Thanks: I’m constantly surprised by the number of people who never say “thank you.” And I’m talking just simply saying, typing or signaling (when in the car) the two words. It’s not that hard! If someone helps you, holds the door for you, or whatever it may be, say thank you!
Well I hope you all enjoyed my etiquette tips for today, and I hope I didn't offend anyone! Thanks to Natasha for letting me post and thank you all for reading. I hope you all have a great week and maybe I’ll be invited back when sweet Carson comes along! Maybe next time I’ll share some funny stories about our beloved “Tat.” Just kidding ;)

- 17 Comments

  1. Great guest post! I think you can never have too many "please" and "thank you"s!

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  2. THANK YOU! I do not live in the South, but I was taught all these guidelines growing up. It amazes me how many people do not do these simple things! The thank-you notes, especially!

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  3. Great Guest Post Meg! So glad you touched on this subject and the wedding shower gift vs. wedding gift is really helpful.

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  4. Great post. I am hosting a baby shower for one of my friends in August and she wanted to invite everyone on her invite list to both showers that she's having (50 people!) and just would not understand why that is not okay... I wish I could tactfully get her to read this and understand, but oh well. We will make it through.

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  5. Malc, not only was this spot on, but it was also very well written. :)
    Speaking of "thank yous" I hope you got our thank you for being a great hostess a couple weekends ago in the mail. Thanks for being a great hostess!

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  6. I would love to get down to the nitty gritty of southern etiquette! My gf is from the South and her mom has SO many rules! Like, always bring a gift for the host, never drink a sip after a cheers was made in your name, etc. Love this stuff!

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  7. Great post and something that is lacking in today's society. I dealt with a lot of these things when I got married and it was so shocking because I was raised to do this things. I will definitely be teaching my future children this.

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  8. Great post- I would love a follow up with more things that are really "southern" like someone else posted, about not sipping after a toast in your honor, ect. Love this type of stuff!

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  9. What a great post - it seems as though etiquette is lost these days...especially saying thank you.
    I vote yes on the funny stories ;)

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  10. Oooo I love etiquette too! I'm old fashioned and seriously believe in thank you notes for everything and always bringing something for the host / hostess! I'd love to hear more from you Meg!

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  11. I don't live in the South either, but I often wish I did - good manners matter! :) Great post!

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  12. Love this! I am from the South and agree with everything. I don't necessarily do a hand-written note for birthday/Christmas gifts but think is a sweet gesture. It's crazy how some wouldn't just be common sense for people, regardless of where you are from? Like simply waving/smiling back! Bless them;)

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  13. I am so glad you decdied to do your post on this! Sadly, I don't think people really consider etiquette anymore. But it's so refreshing when people do things the right way. Let's keep trying to change the world one thank-you note at a time. :)

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  14. Etiquette ,manners,culture is what adds smoothness to the rough edges of civilisations,Without culture we quickly slide back into the Paleolithic era,something best avoided. Being civilised demands precious little; a thank you,a please,a sorry can open doors which no other form of intimidation or coercion
    could ever achieve.Think about it.
    Thanks for a great insight.

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  15. ,Etiquette ,manners,culture is what adds smoothness to the rough edges of civilisations,Without culture we quickly slide back into the Paleolithic era,something best avoided. Being civilised demands precious little; a thank you,a please,a sorry can open doors which no other form of intimidation or coercion
    could ever achieve.Think about it.
    Thanks for a great insight.

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  16. I'm big on RSVP'ing and properly thanking people! So important! Great post!

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