life...struggles and joys

Monday, February 25, 2013

I saw this quote on Pinterest the other day and had to bookmark it immediately because it stood out to me in so many ways. Lately, I have seen and heard a lot of friends, acquaintances, and bloggers going through tough times and it made me stop to think...
I've been told that based on what people see of me and my life here on the blog, it appears we have it all. To be honest though, looking out, I perceive that quite differently. I try to be open and honest with all of you, but I am here to speak to the fact that life isn't always easy.
We have a comfortable lifestyle, have been blessed with Caroline and are now expecting Miss Carson, have a "nice" home, have wonderful family and friends, etc. (you get the idea)...I'm not trying to brag, I just know by taking a quick peak into someone's life, it can seem like things are pretty perfect. But, I do want to let you know we go through the normal day-to-day struggles, too.
  • Jeff and I fight just like any normal married couple...and if you say you never fight, well I guess you're better than us. 
  • I sometimes feel alone since I am a SAHM...there are days where I miss the adult interaction of being in an office and I can't help but miss all the fast-paced deadlines and stress that came along with it. I was good at my job and I felt like I made an impact.  
  • We argue about money and saving and spending and our family's future and what we both want out of life. Sometimes, we're on the same page, sometimes we're not. 
  • There are days when Caroline stresses me out and I just have to walk away and take a "mommy timeout"...babies are tough work and it can overwhelm me. 
  • I worry about what others think about me... this is a characteristic of myself I wish I could say goodbye to, but it is what it is and unfortunately this is something I have to work through. 
  • I had the "baby blues" after CC was born...a scary, crazy time filled with out-of-whack hormones and a roller coaster full of emotions. I was scared to admit it at the time for fear of sounding like a bad mom or a failure, but now I know it's normal and these things happen. I had to find out what my issues were and fix them and then life got SO much better! 
  • I am so OCD about certain things that I drive my husband insane...I'm a perfectionist and I know it's not a lovely trait. The older I get, the more I am learning to let things go.
  • I'm strong, but I'm sensitive. I get my feelings hurt a lot more than I used to. Maybe it's the hormones...
Guess I'm throwing myself under the bus and pointing out lots of flaws for all of you to see, huh? Oh well...I'm only human and Lord knows we all have them. 
See, there are things I may not talk about all the time, but I hope you know each and every one of us have struggles to overcome, and life ain't always easy. I have to constantly remind myself that God has a plan for everyone. The best we can do is to be honest with ourselves... be honest with those around you and seek the help of people we trust the most. They are the ones that are there when the going gets tough...as a shoulder to cry on, as a sounding board for advice, as someone who will tell you they will beat someone up for you (my Dad would totally say that-haha). I'm just saying, don't ever feel like you're alone because you're not.
My friend Cami sent us an email last week talking about "The Gratitude Perspective"...and the first bullet point mentioned how most of us appreciate 85-90% percent of our lives, but that we focus on the 10-15% we're not so fond of. Why is that?? My point is that we all need to stop worrying about the things we don't have, and spend our time and energy on what we DO have and taking time to remember how WONDERFUL life really is.

- 40 Comments

  1. I couldn't agree more with you and I LOVE the first picture you posted because it absolutely true. Great post and I love your honesty.

    Alex
    Bump to Baby

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  2. Love this post because it is so true. It can be difficult to read blogs and immediately count the things I don't have instead of being thankful for what I do! No one has the perfect life - and if someone does I need that secret!

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  3. I really love this post because its true. There's another quote I see on Pinterest often that says something about sometimes the happiest people are the ones that are hurting the most. Looks can be deceiving. :)

    Thanks for being honest!

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  4. I love blogging because it gives us a glimpse into other's lives, but sometimes people FORGET it's just a glimpse. Who wants to read a blog that's always complaining?!!? not me.

    I love reading your blog because of your faith, your kindness, your honesty and just because you genuinely seem like a girl I'd get along with in real life.

    Keep doing what you are doing, people will always judge, it's human nature.

    <3 to you!

    ps.com your lil girl is so adorable, gah!

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  5. What a beautifully honest post! It is easy to think that someone has " it all" based on what they post but we would all be better off if we counted our own blessings daily.

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  6. what a great post! i do tend to over think the things im not crazy about but really the focus should be on the others.

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  7. I love the honesty of your post. You really put yourself out for your readers, and I admire that. It is something I am trying to do.

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  8. Thank you for writing this post. I love it when bloggers are able to be more "real" on their sites because it makes the rest of us feel normal and know we're not the only ones struggling with things. Great post!

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  9. thanks for sharing this :)
    it reminds me of this quote: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_maev9rZzR61qkr7cmo1_400.jpg

    "never let the things you want make you forget the things you have"

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  10. thanks so much for posting this today! it couldn't have come at a better time and I'm going to really focus on being more grateful for the 85-90% that is truly wonderful :-D

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  11. amen love! Yet another great post! I posted about my baby blues ( I was a hot mess) but have to save it felt so great hearing other mom bloggers tell me they went through the same and it would pass! Thank goodness it did bc that was not a fun time. Curious to see if it happens the next go round. xo

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  12. Love this post! I think if someone can admit their faults, they'll appreciate their strengths even more!

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  13. I love this! & i agree not focusing on the 10%, because those are still pretty good odds :) Have a lovely week

    Hannah

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  14. Life is hard and it's not all easy being married (and in your case with kids). Staying true to yourself and not leaning on others for your own self worth/happiness is my advice. I've been learning to do that, although it is a daily struggle. I'm naturally a people pleaser too, so I know how you feel ;)

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  15. What a lovely post Natasha! I feel isolated/ alone a lot as a SAHM and you are so right I always seem to focus on that 10% and I have soooo many blessings to count:) what a great post this Monday thank you!

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  16. this is so so true! i battle with that awful comparison/what people think combo too, and it's such a burden! thanks so much for posting this today!

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  17. I've always enjoyed reading your posts but I will say reading these honest ones are my favorite!! I know a lot of us bloggers want to stay positive when we write for our readers, but I think what draws in your readers and what allows you to build relationships with them is your honesty and willingness to show your vulnerability! I know I am more inclined to read and keep up with someone who is honest on all spectrums than those bloggers who come across as having the "picture perfect" life! I appauld you for stepping outside of your norm and sharing this with all of us!

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  18. Thank you for your honesty. You don't owe an explanation or declaration to anyone, and this was very nice to read. I struggle almost daily with that fact that we haven't had a healthy pregnancy and other people have/do, and I admit that I sometimes think those people take it for granted. This post and the quote are just a reminder that everyone struggles, and we're human, it's ok.

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  19. I love this post! I think our struggles/imperfections are what connects the human race. We all struggle/are imperfect on some level and on some level try to hide those things. Thanks for being so open and honest!

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  20. Love this post! So honest and I completely get everything that you're saying, and it seems that we all have very similar issues as moms & wives. YES to all of the above,especially the OCD.. I am right there with you girl!!Thanks for sharing! :)

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  21. Thanks. I needed to hear this today!

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  22. Great post and very inspirational for the start of the week. I'll be honest, you do always sound so upbeat and that things are so great BUT we all only choose to put on our blog what we want to. It's our choice and I totally respect you for what you want to talk about. I love to read along here because of all of your positive chit chat! ;)

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  23. Thank you for sharing... but I have never looked at your blog and thought - "this girl is annoying or perfect". I, like you, focus mainly on the positive things in my life and don't often find myself writing about the things I am going through for fear of friends and IRL people judging me. I care what people think, too, and sometimes that makes an impact on what I write. I can personally relate to you and that's why I get so much enjoyment out of reading about your life and your beautiful family!

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  24. Great post Natasha. I think we all get carried away with the goals we have set, the things that we want and "need" and forget about what we have and what truly matters. We look at where others are in their lives and think, "I should be there too" when really, God's plan for each and everyone of else moves at different paces and in different directions.

    Thank you for the words of wisdom!

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  25. struggles? i don't know what those are. my husband of four months and i never, ever argue and we have so much money that it's never an issue. planning to start a family creates no stress whatsoever and my life is completely perfect. :) :)

    did i trick ya? heeehe... but i do appreciate this post. and your perspective is right on point. xo my lady.

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  26. It's one of the hardest parts about blogging- you really only want to share the pretty fluffy stuff but in doing so it upsets other people. Everyone just has to remember there is more to a person than the little snip it we see on the internet and that we all have our own struggles and problems. Thanks for being honest and sharing yours

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  27. This is such a great post and I admire you so much for sharing it. I am guilty of a lot of the things you shared-especially the "caring too much about what others think" and "being too sensitive." It's also so easy to share the good things on our blogs because we want to try to focus on the good stuff. No one wants to sit down and write a negative post, but I guess I need to work more on being more realistic and sharing both the highs and lows.

    Thanks for your honesty!

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  28. This is such a great post and I admire you so much for sharing it. I am guilty of a lot of the things you shared-especially the "caring too much about what others think" and "being too sensitive." It's also so easy to share the good things on our blogs because we want to try to focus on the good stuff. No one wants to sit down and write a negative post, but I guess I need to work more on being more realistic and sharing both the highs and lows.

    Thanks for your honesty!

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  29. Carson!!! I love it!!!!!!!

    Another great post, friend! You make me want to focus more on the 85-90% and less on the 5% - 10% that I wish I could change.. bedding.. friends... amount of fights.. amount of spending/saving, etc! The amount that is good should be focused on!!

    I love how positive you are :)

    xo

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  30. Beautiful post. So well said. I think we all struggle with honesty on our blogs. It's so easy to paint a pretty picture that while may not be a lie, may not always be the whole truth either. Blogs are such a wonderful way to share and most of the time I'm thankful that I can only share select information here and there, but I also don't want to give the impression of perfection or feel like my post is deceiving. Such a hard line to toe.

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  31. What a beautiful and inspirational post! No one is perfect and so many times only the really "pretty and perfect" things make it to the blogs or facebook. Thank you for being honest!

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  32. So true!
    We all struggle and have our ups and downs. What matters is how you handle the "bad" moments.

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  33. I think it is hard to judge someone's life based on a blog. Personally I avoid putting anything hard or negative on my blog to avoid hurting others that are involved in the situation. Everyone has their troubles, and it seems always true that you would never want to trade problems with anyone, no matter how perfect their life seems!

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  34. You're amazing for sharing this and I hope you know that this is your space and you can talk about whatever your heart desires...no apologies needed! I love stopping over and seeing what you and your sweet family are up to!! xo

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  35. Sweet friend - great post! I agree 100%, but have to add that I find it a little frustrating that people would form those opinions (about your blog or anyone like you). I often wonder the same thing about my blog and I try to keep it as "real" as possible. BUT, the truth is that we want to share good, positive, fun, pretty things ---- it's just human nature.

    You can't please everyone, but the good news is you don't have to! Y'all are a precious family and this is your space to share exactly what you want to!

    xoxo.

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  36. Great post and thanks for sharing! This post definitely makes me feel I am not alone in feeling many of the same things. And I love the way you ended it, with the reminder to focus on the WONDERFUL life we have been blessed with! Amen Sister!

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  37. I love when big bloggers touch upon this subject. Too often we can get wrapped up in how perfect others lives appear to be through their blog - really, who wants to blog about negative events??

    The baby blues is a HARD thing to deal with, and seems far more taboo of a topic than it should be. I hope it doesn't get you again with Carson! Just know you aren't alone :)

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