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Wedding Wednesday… Helpful Tips and Our Engagement Party!

wedding

August 25, 2010

Back for another installment of my favorite day to blog… all things Wedding Wednesday! This week, I am bringing you helpful tips and reminders from some of my favorite sites/vendors/blogs–hope you find these helpful! I’ll also post where I am with each of these items just so you can hear how I am progressing with the $$$

First things first–via The Knot several weeks ago–“10 Wedding Blunders to Avoid”
1. Blowing Your Fashion Budget On Just the Dress…remember to add tax, alterations, undergarments, shoes, veil, and accessories, which should all be factored into your “dress budget”
Where I’m At: my dress was right on my budget, however my veil definitely was more money than expected–oops! Oh well, Mom agreed and said I just “had to have it”
2. Getting Attached to Specific Flower Types…choose flowers you like, but remember to talk with your florist about possible backup options–things happen and being open to change will help the florist know what you like vs. what you loathe
Where I’m At: still deciding between 2 florists; both know what types of flowers I am OK with, what I ABSOLUTELY must have, and where I am willing to negotiate

3. Sending Out Save-The-Dates Too Soon… it’s tempting to tell everyone about the wedding ASAP, but don’t send those cards out until the guest list is finalized
Where I’m At: For me, my STDs will be going out exactly 8 months prior to my wedding date (etiquette is 6 to 8 months in advance)–and the reasons why: 1) June is the most popular wedding month, and 2) CMA Music Fest is the same weekend, therefore, my OOT guests need to book hotels rooms early because EVERYTHING in Nashville sells out–yes, we have blocks of rooms, but they wont hold them past May!

4. Skipping a Wedding Videographer…they say photos only take you so far, but videos let you hear your vows and watch your friends tear up the dance floor…with more people documenting your wedding, you’ll see things you may have missed
Where I’m At: Unless someone drops some magical wedding dust for my already-over-budget grand total, this will be a NO GO in my book! Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE videographers, but we already spent more than our allotted budget on A LOT of our wedding details (photog, band, caterer, etc.) and those things are far more important to me… plus the vendors I like are pricey so that is an element I am willing to forego
5. Micromanaging Your Vendors…your talented pros should know and understand your vision, so let them do their jobs! It’s tempting to control every detail, but you won’t have the time, and you certainly don’t have the experience. After your initial meetings, trust the pros.
Where I’m At: I micromanage my wedding team (Mom and Jeff and I) and I’ll let my wonderful wedding planner take it from there once all the initial details are all settled =)
6. Picking Your Attendants Too Early…your bridesmaids should be your closest friends. They have to be people you trust to be there when you need them. You don’t know new friends well enough yet to be sure they’ll support you in tough situations, and picking people because a family member demands it or so you and your man will have an even number of attendants are also decisions you’ll likely regret.
Where I’m At: I LOVE each and every single one of my BMs and chose each of them for a specific reason–wholeheartedly know they’ll be there for me through thick and thin and know I made the right decision 100%

7. Telling Everyone About Your Wedding…it’s so hard not to talk about your wedding. The more you share, the more opinions you’re going to get, whether or not you ask. Part of wowing your guests is surprising them. And, talking about your plans means opening yourself up to copycats, who may actually be marrying before you do.
Where I’m At: I talk to my closest friends about the specific details, but some things will be left a surprise for EVERYONE {yes, Meg and Bev, that means you too!}… I do share LOADS of my planning details/process, but I can surprisingly keep a secret =)
8. Starting Your Hair and Makeup Too Late…you don’t want your ‘do to fall out or your makeup to fade before you walk down the aisle, but stylists will likely get to you late if you’re last in the chair. Schedule your appointments in the middle. It’s not a big deal for a bridesmaid to switch to a less complicated hairstyle. That’s not an option for you.
Where I’m At: This is something I hadn’t thought of until now… thanks for the tip!
9. Speeding Through Photos…anything less than an hour isn’t enough for a portrait session; an hour-and-a-half is closer to ideal because you’ll look more relaxed in your pictures…if you refuse to see your groom before the ceremony {that’s me!}, take pictures separately beforehand so the only shots left to take after the ceremony include both of you.
Where I’m At: I think I have this set in stone–from being in so many weddings, I know what works and how to get people moving along, swapping out family for the full bridal party while still making it to the reception on time so the party can begin

10. “Hiring” A Friend Instead of a Pro…your pal was the king of the mix CD back in the day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll make a great wedding DJ. Even on a tight budget, you’re much better off paying a vendor with experience to take care of the biggies, like the music and the food. Don’t you want your friends to enjoy your wedding instead of having to work through it, anyway?
Where I’m At: Completely agree!! No friends working my big day–I want them to ENJOY everything we have planned

I also stumbled across this blog post recently from Kristin Kaplan, a wedding planner here in Nashville…from her blog and company Simply Stunning Events cleverly titled “You Get What You Pay For”… SO TRUE!

And let me try not to squeal with excitement, but I am anxiously counting down the days until  our Engagement Party this weekend!!! 4 of my very best friends {and bridesmaids} are co-hosting the event and Jeff and I couldn’t be more elated to spend some quality time with family and friends Saturday night. We are so blessed that we have an extremely supportive group surrounding us and this journey we’re beginning… can’t wait to tell you all about it next week!!  
  1. B says:

    Those are great tips! Here is my two cents 🙂
    4. Videographer, videographer, videographer! If it's out of your budget, totally understandable, but I waited until about 3 months before our wedding to decide I really wanted one and i'm SO glad I did. It is SO nice to look back on because there are so many little details that you forget. There are very expensive videographers and more reasonable ones. We went with a very reasonable one and we're so completely satisfied with it.
    9. I was SO set on not seeing my husband before our ceremony (and didn't) but I kind of wish I did. There were barely any pictures of my husband and I on our wedding day (staged ones, cute, posey ones) OF COURSE we got the usual cute cake and dancing ones, but I totally wish we would have had more time. Make out a list of all the different poses you'd like to do, so that you don't miss any! I know it sounds silly, but I think it'd be so worth it 🙂

    That is all! Have a blast at your engagement party. YAY!

  2. Your blog is so cute! Memories!!! That day will fly by enjoy and cherish every second of it! You will make a beautiful bride!

  3. Jennifer says:

    4. I am like you in that I spend A LOT of money on the wedding photography because it was really important to me so, a videographer was not in the budget. I wish I would have just gotten the cheapest one available that was just there to film and not do anything fancy with the editing. You can always go back and edit the video yourself. We did have a family member of our video the entrance/exit, vows, kiss, the dances at the reception, and us leaving the reception! My in-laws have bought us a HD video camera so, the quality of the video is pretty good. I would recommend this if a videographer is completely out of the question.

    9. I did not want to see the hubbs before the wedding either, but I also did not want to spend a lot of time at the reception taking pictures. So, our photography focused on group/family shots at the beginning of the reception only. She offered to do a day-after (which was actually done after the honeymoon) for us free of charge because we had sent many other brides to her. I did my own hair and makeup to resemble the wedding day (of course, it didn't look as good, but it didn't have to last all day either), I made a small bouquet, and the hubbs just wore a black suit. We hung out one afternoon in the city with our photographer, and the pictures came out great and to the naked eye you would never think that they were taken after the fact…I love them!!

    I hope this helps with your wedding decision process.

    http://theramblingsofahousewife.blogspot.com/

  4. Caroline says:

    We had a videographer just for the ceremony and it was great! Can't wait to hear more about your engagement party!!

  5. Kristin says:

    Thanks for all those tips!! I am scared about picking the bridesmaids one day!!
    Have fun at your engagement party!!

  6. TOTALLY agree with the no friends working… The last wedding I was in the photographer was a semi friend and he was HORRIBLE I told her not to do it but she did and now I'm retaking their photos together a year later.

    Your going to be great with everything you choose!

  7. a H.I.T. says:

    I have to say, I would HIGHLY recommend re-thinking the videographer. You really don't remember much of the wedding – it's one big whirlwind – so it's nice to actually SEE what happened on that special day. Ask your photographer if they offer it as part of a package – that's how we got a great price on ours.

  8. Emily says:

    We skipped a videographer and we didn't regret it. We also took the photos ahead of time for around an hour and a half. My husband picked his groomsmen a year and a half in advance and was slightly disappointed. He would have change his choice a year before the wedding. Great tips!

  9. Sarah Mina says:

    I read this same article and I am so with you on pretty much everything! My Save-The-Dates are going out EXACTLY 6 months in advance, I am still trying to decide on a florist, I am definitely NOT getting a videographer, and I already knew who my BM's would be so I asked them right away!

  10. Mrs. NotSo says:

    I just recently found your blog and love it! I got married a little over a year ago and think you're right on track. I was opposed to seeing my sweet man before the ceremony as well, but logistics came into play and I ended up seeing him before…and I'm really glad that I did. I was so nervous and anxious before the ceremony – tired of dealing with family and just wanted to see him. We had our special few moments before walking down the aisle. The pictures and memories from those short few minutes are my absolute favorites from the whole day. Just my two cents!

  11. Julia says:

    So some unsolicited advice from a major cheap-skate who thought that videographers were waaaay tacky— hire one!!!! Seriously, I SO regret not having a videographer. You're big day is total blur after-the-fact and all I yearn for is to "re-live" it with some sound and movement. Amazing photos are irreplaceable but video footage is precious, too.

    Of course I think you are a wedding planning wiz and you are doing a great job!

  12. jacquelyn says:

    i was way anti-videographer… my husband and i actually made jokes about how lame it was to sit and watch your wedding video, not to mention it was really not in the budget… BUT… i regretted it as soon as the wedding was over. it all happened so fast, and there were so many people there that i saw names on the sign in book, but never saw in person, i just wish now that i would have had it on camera to remember.

    i still dont think hubs and i would sit around watching it, but it sure would be nice to have, especially right after. even if its just a friend with a personal video camera, i would at least get your ceremony. i dont even remember our exact vows and i wish i could see it all again.

    but– dont do anything you're uncomfortable with budget wise, it is just ONE day, and you wont be any less married if you dont have a video!!! 🙂

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